Birthdays.....

Whatever happened to the days when we looked forward to our birthdays. We always had birthday parties and invited friends over to share cake and play games. Why do we stop having these celebrations?

Recently, I turned 27. I know it's by no means elderly, but 30 is closing in fast, and I am no where near where I wanted to be by the time I was 30.

My biggest regret is quitting college. Now I'm trying to figure out how I can be a full time online student and work full time and keep my part time job and still have extra money every month. So for anyone contemplating quitting college - DON'T DO IT! Either stick it out or transfer schools!

I'm sure a lot of people think that I want to be married by the time I'm 30. Wrong! I have long figured out that marriage and children are not for me. Everytime I hear a child crying or misbehaving, I'm very glad I don't have children. I'm not saying I will never marry or have children, it's just not a priority in my life.

I feel as if my life has flown by. I also feel like I have not lived my life to it's full potential. I know I let other people's feelings and opinions shape my life. I'm also too afraid of failure to put myself out there in the world. When I die, I want to have done everything I have ever wanted to do in life and have no regrets.

Another huge factor in my life is my parents. I never thought that by the time I was 24 I would have buried both my parents and been completely on my own by then. I have experienced so many emotions in the last 5 years that I feel like I'm mentally exhausted. The two emotions I have yet to experience in the last several years has been peace and true happiness.

Since 30 is knocking on my door, I have decided to set a few goals for myself in the next few years. I plan to return to college. Even if it takes everything I have, I want to do it for me. I want to be at peace with my parents death. I want to go for a long time without feeling negative effects from their deaths. I want to travel to a foreign country. It may only be Canada, but I want to see someone else's culture. Those are the 3 big ones I'm working on. I have a few other things on my list like get a tattoo and jump out of an airplane, but I'm going to keep on working on that list. So please wish me luck in the next 3 years!!!!!!